Bending over backwards for votes. How low will the Talking Mullet go with this political limbo dance?

Jenny The Talking Mullet Hill has gone all musical this week, and it bodes ill for a murky council election campaign, which is apparently already underway. That is, if The Mullet and Typo Gleeson, Labor's carnival barker and editor of North Queensland's version of Pravda are to be believed. (Believed? Oh, Magpie, you old thigh-slapper, stop it.)
First a little background.

Of Bats, Rats, Resignations and Typo's Reality Check

Uh oh, whose not telling Mummy everything?

On Wednesday last, the AG Cameron Dick announced that the government would be sticking to optional preferential voting at state elections, as versus Labor-favoring, Green-defeating compulsory preferential voting.

On Thursday, after Dizzy Desley Boyle and bucolic rough-head humorist Robert Schwarten chucked in the towel and announced they were quitting the cabinet and wouldn't be standing for re-election to boot, the words `rats', `sinking ship' and the unseemly hasty departure therefrom sprang to mind. 

But on the teev that night, Mother Blight put on a brave face and said she didn't `know of anyone else who was resigning from cabinet or not running again in the next election'.

Then all of a sudden, we woke as the cock crew'd the next morn to learn someone else had come out of the cabinet; Tourism Minister Peter Lawlor pulled the pin on his poisoned chalice portfolio, although vowing to stay on as an MP.

Anyone else, Anna? Well … errr, um, should The Magpie be the one to break the news to her?  

The Astonisher Caught Off-Guard at Carmichael's Gutsy Public Counter-Attack

More on that shortly, but first the recent weather. If you say `what weather?', go back to your darkened, soundproof room and lie down again until you are called. By God.

It would be fair to say that cyclones are very instructive in ways we would never have before contemplated, and those who have experienced it, even those of us here in Townsville who got the whiplash tail of the worst storm to hit Australia, will be doing some deep self-evaluation and examination of lessons learned. 

For The Magpie, the biggest revelation was how quickly he learned how to pee by ear in pitch black circumstances. The technique of assuming the forward-leaning, one-fisted `flying superman' posture during the trial and error search for the right tinkling target was quickly if damply acquired. All this may serve The Magpie well as he ages down the years by saving on overnight electricity bills. The clean-out of the fridge was also instructive, with several use-by dates stamped `consume before AD happens', and a tub of tomato paste with a luxuriant black fuzz which alarmingly resembled rude bloke Benny Vernon the morning after a hard night (ie every morning).

But there are others whose self-examination may have to go somewhat deeper.

Chief among these are two locals; a `cowardy custard' Craig Cuddlepie Wallace, the state Minister for Mean Roads, (and mean is the word), and the other one is our old local Laurel and Hardy team down at the Daily Astonisher, Peter Typo Gleeson and his dancing master Michael `Shrek' Wilkins, the mass-sacking Ogre of Ogden Street.

Pissed Off and Punching Back: Local Company Takes On Murdoch's Daily Astonisher

This is the media statement made by Carmichael Ford, lambasting the Townsville Bulletin for what the company sees as last Wednesday's front page smear. The full background to this fascinating stoush is detailed in the preceding post `Cuddlepie A Cowardy Custard and The Astonisher Astonished at Carmichael Gutsy Counter-Attack.'

For you old buggers, both of you, who have trouble reading this, here is the statement in full:

Our staff members received their payslips this Tuesday for last week. The payslips indicated that they had been paid annual leave for Wednesday and Thursday. This decision was made by our Group Financial Controller. His good intentions were to ensure all staff got paid without delay, despite our computer systems still being restored on generator power. Annual leave was chosen to simplify the process and to pay leave loading for those days.

It must also be said that we did ask our staff to come to work on Friday to help where they could. No warnings were current and with a wages bill of over $40,000 per day we needed to do all we could to get back to work as soon as possible. Of our nearly 100 staff only 5 did not come to work.
Those staff members will be asked to either take that day as Annual Leave or Unpaid Leave. It isn’t fair for the 95% of the staff who came to work if we don’t do that.

Glen, myself and some of our staff are in San Francisco attending NADA, the worlds largest Automotive Dealer convention. Our Group Financial Controller called Glen at 11.00am Tuesday (5.00pm San Francisco) to discuss his decision. Glen and I decided it would be better to make an adjustment in the next pay period to restore the days of Wednesday and Thursday to normal time,
and make any leave loadings paid a bonus. This was communicated to all of our management team at 6.00pm that day once the necessary changes had been made in our payroll system.

On being told Glen was overseas, rather than verifying the facts of the matter, the Bulletin’s General Manager instead left a voice mail message on Glen’s phone late on Wednesday night (San Francisco time). If the journalists and management of the Townsville Bulletin were more concerned with accurate
journalism rather than cheap sensation, they would have waited until they had
discussed the matter with one of the principals of the business before going to print.

At significant incremental expense, Glen stayed in Townsville to ensure that the Carmichael Ford team could support its customers and staff through such a challenging time. It was always our priority to ensure our staff members were paid on time and completely. Which is what we did and more. Any inference that we have acted “heartlessly” in anyway is false and we intend to vigorously
defend ourselves against such a sensational and unwarranted allegation.

We are working to get back into operation as quickly as possible for the benefit of all our staff and customers. This is a very difficult time for everyone in Townsville. We fail to see what value this poor level of reporting adds to a community that needs to focus on rebuilding ourselves, our homes, our
families, and our community.

Carmichael Ford has been a generous supporter of Townsville, its spirit and people for over 30 years. We feel this attack on our business is very hurtful and deserves at least an apology from the Townsville
Bulletin. It is incumbent upon all of us to stand up to global conglomerates like News Limited whose only interest is making profits for its shareholders, certainly not the people of Townsville.

Andrew Carmichael Executive Director | Glen Sharp Dealer Principal