Has Typo Gleeson returned to The Astonisher and is working in the paper’s bean counter’s back office? Seems so. And the dos and don’ts, the cans and can’ts of bumper sticker campaigning.

The Spanish have a saying ‘Don’t speak unless you can improve on the silence’.

Well, folks, it’s time to move to Spain, the cacophony of a Queensland election is about to descend upon us; the Cackling Crap-O-Meter will be off the scale for the next few weeks.  

The Magpie reckons there will be little in deliberate humour to be had as the mud merrily sails hither and yon, but he has found one little gem for you as the campaign kicks off.

Humour also hides itself in the most unexpected of places before leaping out at you and yanking open its gabardine overcoat to give you a full frontal chortle. So this week, The ‘Pie was really caught off-guard when he was rollicked by none other than the Daily Astonisher aka the Townsville Bulletin. And not just in their news pages.

All that and other drivel, right here in the nest at www.townsvillemagpie.com.au

Horses for courses - looking at the political races this year from a punter's point of view.

First up, the best one liner out of the ABC's cricket commentary this week: What do you call an Indian cricketer with 100 against his name? Answer: a bowler. 

But a smug Aussie Magpie digresses.

As he contemplates the year ahead, The 'Pie has been much occupied by a particular proverb - if wishes were horses, then beggars would ride. 

This ageless observation, succinctly summing up desire versus reality, is very relevant in 2012 as we enter a year which will see two if not three elections at all three levels of government.

And the old bird will use it to flog his own favourite nag named Overdone Metaphor, as he surveys the political landscape ... and resident doodler Bentley is back from hols, with his own unique take things, all here in this week's nest at www.townsvillemagpie.com.au  

Just silly stuff for the silly season.

'Tis the season to be silly - in this neck of the woods, that season usually runs from Jan 1 to Dec 31 - but just how silly is this: The Magpie agrees with The Moaning Mullet on one particular end-of-year issue!

That little astounder will be revealed shortly, but otherwise, the old bird has made a departure from his usual drivel and has collected a few funnies sent to him in past months, all good for a holiday larf or two. 

It'll be back into the thick of things later in January, but for now, just in case you don't plough through to the end of this warmed-over offering, may both you readers have a great 2012, and may all those blundering pollies continue on their blusetring way - after all, they keep The 'Pie in business at www.townsvillemagpie.com.au

Here's a serious question: why is Craig Wallace trying to throw this election?

Now this isn't a question from an educated posterior - an anatomical anomaly often referred to by those who communicate with the old bird by the somewhat terser term 'smart arse ' - no, it is a fair dinkum question for which a very strong case can be mounted. 

Which The Magpie will shortly do.

This issue also raised a couple of related questions about interconnected matters, like Queensland Health. 

A couple of new words entered the Magpie lexicon during the week, and most apt and timely they were, along with the saying of the week, from the American Republicans campaign to find a challenger for Bazza Obama.

Also, over in Scandanavia, recently most famous for creating a deranged psycopathic killer of holidaying children, one very respectable Swedish group wants this Christmas to be a real blast ... they are selling - for charity - Christmas tree ornaments shaped like hand grenades. The 'Pie has a pretty pic to prove it.

And just to lighten up a bit, the biting wit of a British politician at his slice and dice best when putting those European foreigner chappies in their place.

All this and plenty of other idiocy in this week's nest at www.townsvillemagpie.com.au

The Ogre is at it again - suppressing a hard news story not to his commercial liking, and rumours that a certain Kat is purring around a star council candidate.

Yep, yet another episode in the on-going saga of all the news that's fit to print but isn't, because it might upset the Astonisher's bottom line.

That's just one of the tidbits in a right old grab bag this week, ranging from the inconclusive (Mary Vernon to run for council? If she does, it will be under the funniest political slogan ever in this town) to the downright scurrilous - did Julia Gillard once confess to being what Mongrel the Barrister indelicately calls 'a rug muncher'?

The Silly Old Duffer award taken out by the naughtiness of former Astonisher boss 'Mad Max' Tomlinson: The Silly Young Duffer award goes to the Astonisher's new boy-editor Lachlan Heywood who applauds lawlessness - it's there in black and white; and photographic proof that the Nanny Staters are here, right in lil ol' Townsville.

It's all packed into the first of the silly season's nests, www.townsvillemagpie.com.au

Well, that same sex marriage law makes something else official, then. We really do live in ... ummm, well ... Queensland.

We take a gander at the ins and outs of all that, along with what next in this personal relationship arena. 

Plus Team Mullet ambles onto the stage, but despite the valiant and admirable effort at political recycling, The Moaning Mullet has failed to mention her secret weapon. But The'Pie will. 

And its been the week of endangered species, from Tasmania right up here to good old Godzone aka NQ, with godzillianair Clive  'Teletubby' Palmer scoring the best verbal point of the round.

It's all here in this week's Nest, at www.townsvillemagpie.net.au